Friday, 7 November 2014

Boobaversary

Yes, it's hard to believe but it's been a whole year since my surgery!  There's been a lot of adjustments over the course of the year, but I'm still incredibly happy that I had it done.  I thought I would do a one-year-later post for anyone who is contemplating having the surgery done to give them an idea of what they might expect.

It really did take a long time for things to go back to normal.  It sounds bizarre to say, but for the longest time (basically all winter, I suppose) I had an irrational fear that I was going to trip or slip on some ice, and fall flat on my chest and basically my new boobs would just explode.  I felt very sewn together and fragile for long after the stitches healed.  It probably took a good three months before I stopped feeling so paranoid, and probably took about as long for the shape to kind of finalize.  I didn't realize at first how swollen things were.  It seems counter-intuitive, but they seemed much smaller at first because of all the bruising and swelling.  You would think they would seem larger, but apparently not.  They felt really hard for the first few months, but eventually everything softened and kind of ended up in their place.  Now I feel very comfortable with the size and shape.  I feel proportionate, but still like myself.  I was lucky, and haven't had any loss of sensation.  That was one of the big side effects that they warned me about - the potential for loss of sensation, or for having increased sensitivity afterwards.  I seem to be lucky though and have about the same sensation as I had before, so hooray!  I did have a lot of random pains for months afterwards though - especially through the cold weather months.  Every now and then out of nowhere I would just get a sharp, shooting pain, typically where one of the incisions was.  I was told that it was from the nerves repairing themselves, and that it was normal.  Nothing too painful, just kind of annoying.

Socially it's been a big change.  I loved being able to wear tank tops this summer, and bra shopping is actually fun!  It's such a relief to not worry about a bra strap showing - now that they're thinner and cuter I don't care so much as when they were inch thick Grandma straps.  It was so freeing to be able to wear a bathing suit without the effort and strain that I once had.  And I must say that my golf swing has improved!  Everything is just easier, and I don't feel self-conscious all the time.  I have noticed how terrible my posture is though - I still have to really focus on pulling my shoulders back and not hunching all the time.  Years of trying to fold myself in and hide is a hard habit to break!

The scarring has gotten better.  It's noticeable, but it doesn't bother me.  The one side is a bit worse because that's where I had the healing issues initially.  They still seem to be fading though, and I'm so pale naturally that things always seem worse.  The other side still has one little discoloured area, but it too seems to be fading and doesn't bother me.

My wrists have gotten a lot better, because my back isn't as sore anymore.  I can wake up without feeling stiff and generally feel more flexible.  It's amazing how much damage they were doing.

Some of the more unusual or funny results have been people meeting me after the surgery and then finding out that I'd had it done.  The reaction is always the same - "So, this is the after?"  Yes, this is the after.  Yes, it was insane before.  I'm sitting at a 36DDD now, which I know isn't small.  It's actually a bit of a pain because I'm still right on the border for some stores (I still have to hear, "Oh, that style doesn't come in that size..." at Victoria's Secret) but I'm glad I didn't go any smaller.  It still seems so small to me when I remember where I was at before though.  I also sleep in a bra all the time now.  I never used to before - it was always a struggle to make it to the end of the day when I felt safe enough to take off my bra.  I would only take it off later on in the evening when I was sure that no one would stop by the house for any reason, because I was never comfortable having people see me without a bra.  After the surgery I had to have a bra on constantly unless I was showering for six weeks.  Once I eased out of the surgical bra, I started just wearing cheap, flimsy sports bras at night.  I kind of got hooked on it and still find myself wearing them to bed, even though I don't need to and don't feel as self-conscious about being braless - at home, at least!

I'm still finding it difficult to try new clothes and see how things fit me now, but I'm trying to be more open-minded.  It's definitely been easier to try things, but I have to remember to try different sizes instead of always defaulting to the XL (still XL in most things, but I need to remember to try things on first!).  I'm definitely more comfortable now, and just happier.  If you're considering having it done, I definitely recommend it.  It's an amazing difference.  And if you have any questions, you can definitely email me, or message me on Facebook.  I don't have a problem answering any of the more nitty-gritty questions!

Happy Boobaversary to me, well to us!

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