At 22 weeks, I've been thinking a lot about whether we'll be welcoming a little boy or a little girl to our family in December. I've said from the start that I think it's a boy, and I've been hoping for a boy. I've always pictured myself having a boy first, probably since I always wanted an older brother growing up (instead I ended up with two younger brothers who are just much, much bigger than me). I wouldn't be upset if we had a girl, but the more I think about it, the more I'm a bit intimidated about having a girl.
I've probably just been reading too much about gender roles and parenting on Offbeat Mama, but it's been making me concerned about if we have a girl, what kind of choices we should make in parenting.
I want my kids to know that it's okay if they want to dress up as a boy or a girl, despite what others might say. I don't necessarily want to dress a little girl up in pink and frills all the time, nor do I want a little boy to think he has to be masculine and macho. Puppies and trucks are just as much fun for little girls as they are for little boys, and rainbows and kittens are just fine for little boys.
I've never considered myself a feminist, but I find myself restricted by how gender-defined everything is for babies. Why does everything have to be in either blue or pink? And who decided that green and yellow were somehow gender neutral, and only okay for the very beginning until you know what you end up with? I'm finding myself much more drawn to the gender neutral clothes, the ones in fun oranges with circles or a cool green with rocket ships but find it difficult to find them in larger sizes than 3-6 months. What happens after then? You have to either stick to the boys or girls side of the store?
I figure I wear boys clothes most of the times (at least I used to, when I could still fit into little boys T-shirts) and there's nothing wrong with me. I hope my kids can grow up to learn that you don't have to fit into a box to fit in.