Wednesday, 21 October 2009

A Rose By Any Other Name...

Hey there! I'm still planning on blogging extensively about the wedding and honeymoon, but I'm just trying to sort through some pictures first so I can walk you all through it.

The wedding is done, and all the stuff is almost put away. I'm starting on the thank you cards this weekend and then the wedding will be over. Finally!

The main task right now is the name change. Oh, the name change.

Through the whole engagement process, people kept asking me if I was planning on changing my name. The strange thing was, I felt I had to explain myself as to why I would be changing my name. It was almost like today it's more common and accepted for women to keep their maiden name, or to hyphenate in some way. I wasn't into the hyphenation, it's just too cumbersome. I was pretty set on taking on his name, because we want kids and I wanted us to have a name as a family, instead of different last names. Besides, the cats already have Jagger's last name at the vets, so I was already outnumbered.

It was really strange, the more people asked me about it, the more I felt that I had to explain myself. Now that I'm in the middle of changing it, I realize why women don't change their names - it's a colossal pain in the neck.

Seriously - do you know how many things have your name on it? All my email addresses are now "wrong". I need to get a new signature, change my name at the bank, on my credit cards, on my driver's licence and insurance...I can't even keep track of all the things that need to be changed. So far, all I've changed is my facebook name and my email signature at work. I'm still waiting to hear back from HR at work to change my name on my paystub and everything else...sigh, so much work. I'm going to the MTO tomorrow because I have to renew the sticker on my plates and renew my licence, but I don't think I'll be able to change my name on the licence yet because I don't have the marriage certificate yet, just the record of marriage. They really make things difficult on people.

I do think I might keep my maiden name as a second middle name, just so it's still there. I just like my maiden name, it's a good name.

Eventually, I'll get things all changed. Until then, just call me Ashlie Hawkins - er, I mean Ashlie Benham.


Anonymous said...

I agree! Changing your last name is a ridiculously long and complicated process. Steve and I got married in June and I yet to receive our marriage certificate from the government!! And of course no one will change your name without it. I also had many people question why I would change my name, and others warned me against doing it because they had so many problems. I want to have the same last name as Brady, so it was a no brainer for me too! It takes a while to get used to a new name...when you've had the same name your whole life, and then one day it's different, it's quite an adjustment. And especially when you have to bounce between 2 names for so long. Good luck with changing your name! My battle still has not ended...

P.S. It's Steph Stewart...Ross?
I have to post as Anonymous because I don't have an account...

ashlie said...

Argh, I can't believe you haven't gotten your certificate yet! What a pain, I can't believe how difficult it has been! It's strange that people question you changing your name - I guess that's just the way things go though. At least I'm not the only one having a hard time!